There are some things I just do not want to contemplate. Some things are just too... jarring... to be considered. Imagine a Veggietales script written by Stephen King. Or a movie version of Wheel of Time starring Elmo as Rand. Head hurt yet? Better grab some pain killers; this next one could be painful.
Last month, Blizzard Entertainment purchased the trademark rights for the Redneck Rampage series. Remember those games? Couple of random Arkansas hillbillies chasing aliens through trailer parks to rescue their pig? And of course you're familiar with Blizzard, the Midas-like studio that produces nothing but best selling, standard setting titles... at the pace of about one ever three years or so. Blizzard owns the rights to Redneck Rampage?
Now I'm not saying that Blizzard could not make a fantastic game to continue that series. Just the opposite. I'm frightened they would make a fantastic game. Consider this: Diablo 2 is still high on the sales charts ten years after it came out. And no, thats not a result of Diablo 3. Diablo 2 never left the upper altitude of the sales charts. Nor has Starcraft. So imagine now it is the year 2025. Imagine seeing a headline "Blizzard's Redneck Rampage Still Tops Sales, Now Ten Years Old." Gamers by and large already suffer from rampant stereotyping. We are all basement dwellers, all play World of Warcraft, all use Grand Theft Auto to train for lives of crime, and do other assorted unlikely things to grant Jack Thompson a purpose in life. I do not think a fantastically successful Redneck Rampage would help that situation much.
On the other hand, Blizzard and Activision are now one. It could be that Activision is the one that wants Redneck Rampage. Maybe there's a 'Guitar Hero: Truckers and Aliens' in the works? I hope so. I'm not saying that I wouldn't enjoy a Blizzard built game centered on pickup trucks, shotguns, and pig swiping Martians. I would probably love it. I'm just saying the possibility is one of those things I do not want to contemplate.
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